What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
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