if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
