that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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