we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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