i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
