So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
