I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
