How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
