idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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