she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
