His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
