The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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