So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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