it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
