I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
