Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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