So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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