I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
