Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
