; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
