I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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