Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
