Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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