Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize