Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
