Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
