wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
