So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
