You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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