that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
