woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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