My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
