Soap is not a condiment
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
