we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize