I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
