Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(650): View more from California

Is it normal to miss your booty call?

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again

Fav 64 3562 1191
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(512): View more from Texas

I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking

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(253): View more from Washington

Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.

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(970): View more from Colorado

Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.

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(513): View more from Ohio

Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me

Fav 13 3578 1965
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(540): View more from Virginia

Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.

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(317): View more from Indiana

Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.

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(804): View more from Virginia

School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign

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