I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
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