I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
