mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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