This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize
