How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
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