Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
