I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
