can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
