You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
