Say something about gay babies.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
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