C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
It's just like the Real World with babies
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Randomize
