It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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