We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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