I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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